Brexit winners and losers
Brexit winners and losers: Cornish fishermen, the British people and Boris Johnson emerge victorious… as Nicola Sturgeon, the Guardian and Remainer pundits lose out
WINNERS
CORNISH FISHERMEN
Like trawlermen in other UK ports, Newlyn boat skippers have welcomed much bigger amounts of the fish quota being ‘repatriated’. Meanwhile, Dutch rival Nathanel Middlekoop whinges: ‘The EU is transferring €1.6 billion of fishing rights to the UK.’
LADY FROST
At last, the wife of Britain’s chief negotiator, Lord (David) Frost – herself a former ambassador to Somalia – will see more of him, rather than being a Brexit widow for months as he shuttled endlessly between Brussels and London.
NIGEL FARAGE
After nearly 30 years of (sometimes single-handed) struggle, surely he now deserves a knighthood. Arise, Sir Nigel of Brexit?
CORNISH FISHERMEN: Like trawlermen in other UK ports, Newlyn boat skippers have welcomed much bigger amounts of the fish quota being ‘repatriated’
THE GOOD FOLK OF KENT
The avoidance of No Deal will stop the ‘Garden of England’ from becoming a giant lorry park and latrine since freight drivers won’t have to queue for miles while awaiting checks to cross the Channel.
BORIS JOHNSON
After rightly being showered with plaudits, he can focus on marrying fiancee Carrie and raising baby Wilf. Also, there’s the no small task of ending Covid restrictions, rebuilding the economy, saving the Union, fixing social care etc etc.
COSTA DEL CRIMINALS
Although we remain signed up to DNA, fingerprint and vehicle registration databases, there are fears that our loss of access to other crime information systems will make it easier for fugitive Britons living abroad to avoid justice.
NIGEL FARAGE: After nearly 30 years of (sometimes single-handed) struggle, surely he now deserves a knighthood. Arise, Sir Nigel of Brexit?
THE FACTORY IN POLAND MAKING UK PASSPORTS
In production since March, there will be much greater demand for the new, blue £75.50 passports.
THE BRITISH PEOPLE
Undoubtedly the biggest winners. After 47 years yoked to other European countries and subject to laws set in Brussels, the mandate of the largest vote in British history has been honoured.
LOSERS
KATYA ADLER
The BBC’s Europe Editor has been a near-constant harbinger of doom on our TV screens since the run-up to the referendum. The 48-year-old mother-of-three, who speaks five languages, will surely now struggle to find anything to report to justify her £210,000 salary.
SCOTTISH POTATO FARMERS
Seed potatoes (tubers used to grow new plants) are on a par with salmon or whisky as a premium export, worth £112 million a year. Although EU will allow almost all UK food and plant imports, seed potatoes are banned.
KATYA ADLER: The BBC’s Europe Editor has been a near-constant harbinger of doom on our TV screens since the run-up to the referendum
THE GUARDIAN NEWSPAPER
In apoplectic mood, it says Boris ‘deserves no credit’, having ‘played the system cynically’. A bad end to a year when the world’s most woke newspaper had to confront the fact that it was founded with a fortune linked to cotton slaves.
STUDENTS
For more than 30 years, the Erasmus scheme has offered British students the opportunity to study for a year at another European university. But failure to agree the costs of continued membership has ended our participation – albeit replaced with a scheme named after wartime codebreaker Alan Turing.
NICOLA STURGEON: Scotland’s First Minister would have screamed betrayal whatever happened, but her case for independence will be harder considering the special protections for industries such as fisheries, Arbroath smokies and Orkney cheddar
NICOLA STURGEON
Scotland’s First Minister would have screamed betrayal whatever happened, but her case for independence will be harder considering the special protections for industries such as fisheries, Arbroath smokies and Orkney cheddar.
REMAINER PUNDITS
It’s a hope – but, sadly, unlikely to be fulfilled – that rent-a-quotes such as Alastair Campbell, Lord Adonis and Lib Dem leader Sir Ed Davey will be offered fewer primetime platforms on BBC Radio 5 and Sky News.
Makers of car number-plate stickers with EU stars symbol From January 1, if your car sports one of these, you’ll need a separate GB sticker when driving in the EU.
Compiled by JAMES HEALE
